Friday, May 1, 2009

Retiring with stepmom

Not all stepmoms and stepdads are witches. My Dad 3 is a kid in a big man's body. Who could not love a child? Although inherently naughty, kids are positively pure. Likewise, stepmom is proving to be not the monster that I once painted in my mind as a child.

Stepmom is supposed to be a total stranger, but she is the least of it. Unknown to me, all these years, I have been part of her life as a wife to my Dad 1. I thank her for that. More importantly, I appreciate her efforts to connect with my family and help me understand my roots.

Over lunch one time, stepmom unveiled her true character.

In me, stepmom saw a young Dad 1. It must have scared her. Seriously, it was an invaluable genetics-learning session, with emphasis on exploiting the good and departing from things that could jeopardize my marriage. I could only think highly of her for drawing from experience, painful and otherwise; it showed her vulnerability. She was determined to mold me into a better person, son, spouse, and father.

Stepmom, similar to Dad 3, is kind-hearted. She is a loving mom. I hope Dad 1 realizes, while there is still time, that retirement is better with family than in a faraway place. In some respects, I am different. I will leave work for home. I will find happiness in Shiela; my wife will never be alone.

Not all spouses are like stepmom. Even in the middle of a chilly european winter, Dad 1 will surely feel the warmth of stepmom's love radiating from New York. Pure luck!

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